July 20, 2020 |
What did you want to be when you were younger? A pilot? Racing driver? Astronaut, maybe? How about a High Society Memeologist? For our favourite Instagram account, Super Slutty Snake, becoming a meme connoisseur was written in the stars. “I didn’t choose the meme life, it chose me,” they say. “Two and a half years ago what started off as a silly bet between friends snowballed into what I now call my career, which is truly mad. I think once I started to realise that people genuinely loved what I was doing, was the moment that I knew I had to pursue this path with all my gusto.”
If you’re not one of the 107 thousand people already following Super Slutty Snake, the account basically rips apart the biggest “walking contradictions” in the upper classes through a series of ‘Starter Packs’. From Miami fuckboys and Old Money Patriarchs, to Ibiza bouncers and boarding school poshos – no one is safe in the hands of Super Slutty Snake. The account’s frankly brilliant take on society’s biggest imbeciles has earned them some rather A-list super fans, including none other than Mr Leonardo DiCaprio. “He is the living embodiment of the super slutty snake,” they say. “We have had ongoing banter on the page for over a year and I have been told that he loves the memes. I don’t think anyone on this planet can compete with him when it comes to being a complete icon of the social scene, yet absolutely incredible at his job.”
Aside from trolling absolutely everyone, Super Slutty Snake have their very own podcast, where week-upon-week they dissect everything that makes up (and plagues) high society. There’s even a Super Slutty Snake e-store, packed with hoodies, caps and bucket hats perfect for fulfilling all your rich girl fantasies – we suggest you ask your sugar daddy to buy the lot! We wanted to know what life was like in society’s top 1%, so we asked the queen of the luxury Instagram meme-scene some questions. Prepare to be read for filth!
1. What does it take to be a ‘High Society Memeologist’?
“Well, aside from being ridiculously intelligent, one must have an encyclopaedic knowledge of every idiosyncratic stereotype that exists within the weird and wonderful world of “high society”. One then needs to be able to pick apart every strand of each stereotype with a surgical accuracy and translate those insights into visual humour. Finally, one must possess the literary skillset of a hybrid lab creation of Shakespeare bred with Baudelaire, and put a finger to iPhone to produce a Pullitzer-worthy caption masterpiece for each meme. If it was easy, everyone would do it, right?”
2. If it wasn’t for Instagram, how would you be spending your days?
“Mememing really is so therapeutic for me, so I would most likely exist in a permanently angry/frustrated state. Since I’m just counting down the days till my inheritance and have no pressure to work, I feel like I would want to do something magnificently stupid, like creating an alpaca sanctuary on the family estate. I would buy in the region of 1,000 alpacas and insist that they all wear custom alpaca RayBans (if you haven’t seen the picture, Google it). One alpaca at least would have to be called 2-Paca. It would also be a requirement that there are comfy, fluffy chairs everywhere to enjoy the alpacas grazing and perhaps the soundtrack could be “Everywhere’ by Fleetwood Mac. Sounds like paradise.”
3. If you had to do a starter pack for Super Slutty Snake during lockdown, what pictures would you include?
“Definitely Kleenex balsam tissues for the amount of crying I’ve been doing. Mr Porter and Amazon logos, because I’m addicted to buying stupid shit I don’t need. Joe Exotic’s face because I watched Tiger King five times. Air Dior sneakers because no-one has those bad boys and I love nothing more than triggering hypebeasts by posting them on my stories. Finally, I would say the Deliveroo logo, because I probably spent the GDP of El Salvador on Nobu takeaway during lockdown.”
4. How does one go about becoming a Super Slutty Snake meme?
“That’s an easy one, keep being a ridiculous walking contradiction that is totally oblivious to how silly you are, and you’ll have a fairly great chance of being one of my memes. I enjoy making fun of people that deserve to be ridiculed, that’s the general rule. I’m always open to new inspiration, so if you have someone in mind, DM me.”
5. What’s your average screentime?
“4hr 40 currently. Is that bad? I can’t believe I waste that much of my day on this crap; I mean, it’s my job so I’m excused right?”
6. If Super Slutty Snake had to escape Instagram, which other social media platform would you head?
“I like Twitter A LOT. I will definitely start one for Slutty Snake quite soon, I just feel like I’m not famous enough yet for people to care about my opinion on random stuff. Also, as you know, I love rambling on and on so the character limit might prove troublesome. The next logical step for me though is YouTube; I’m obsessed with it anyway and spend all my time watching Joe Rogan interviews. I feel like my followers are crying out for video content, so whether it’s on YouTube or some other platform it doesn’t matter. There are exciting things in the works, I promise.”
7. If you had to make a starter pack for 10 Magazine, what would you include?
“The most important item would be a black Super Slutty Snake cap; elegant, trendy and just the right amount of slutty, just like 10 Magazine. Air Dior’s for sure, so we can both wear them and just saunter around London feeling like fabulous, superior humans/snakes. Definitely the Chiltern Firehouse bar or Soho House Greek St, I feel like that’s definitely your vibe. Saint Laurent jacket, Gucci hoodie, white James Perse t-shirt, oat milk flat white, Garrett Leight sunglasses and a speech bubble saying, “darling, it’s called fashion.”
8. If Super Slutty Snake ever went on a worldwide tour, what would be on your rider?
*When I go on a worldwide tour. Firstly 15 magnums of Rumor Rosé, my favourite wine in the world. 10 luminous magnums of Don Julio 1942, Loro Piana baby cashmere blankets, 69 Byredo bibliotheque candles, Greek barista capable of making frothy Freddo cappuccinos with Oatly oat milk, five L’Eto Caffe saffron cakes, two grape and mint shishas with cold pipe, Cipriani baked tagliolini with ham, Harmless Harvest coconut water and Nobu sushi counter.”
9. What’s the weirdest DM you’ve ever received?
“WAY too many to mention. Dennis Rodman sliding in, asking to do a clothing line collab was VERY bizarre. Also, people always DM me abuse accusing me of being a jealous socialist that hates rich people, those are very amusing.”
10. What makes a high society reject?
“Someone that tries way too hard to be somebody they are not. ATTENTION. 80% of the social scene, stop talking shit! Keep it real. Also, I can’t stand when people have no personality, so they just throw money at everyone in the desperate hope that people might like them. Newsflash, once the money stops they won’t like you anymore.”
