June 7, 2016 |
Another day, another red carpet, another, etc, etc, etc… This time, it was the turn of the CFDAs to give us what we refer to as our personal crack, large hits of famous people and eye-catching fashions. Yes, eye-catching. Because this was nothing if not eye catching. And who was it that caught our collective eye? Who didn’t would be an easier question to answer, but because we go by the name of 10, we’ve somehow managed to narrow our selection down to our top 10 catches of eye. Believe you me, it wasn’t easy.
Personally I have always been mildly obsessed with the women I refer to as the queens of New York fashion, Queen Vera of Wang, Queen of the bridal dress, and Queen Norma of Kamali, queen of the bombshell swimsuit. So much so that I aspire, or try to as much as I can seeing that I live in London, am unmarried and encase myself in a swimsuit maybe once a decade, to live my life in a more Vera and Norma way. What would my two queens do is a question I always ask when I find a situation to be perplexing. For example, if I were to be invited to CFDA’s what would I wear? The swimwear or the bridal couture? Well neither. Are Vera or Norma wearing either? No. Instead they are both chicly swathed in columns of black looking well, chic. Once again, they’ve answered that most perplexing of questions with impeccable taste. And since we’re on the subject of chic black columns, can we take a moment to bow down at the feet of the ever immaculate Naomi Campbell? That pose, that dress, that plait! It’s giving me life, like a shot of adrenalin to the heart. Next up is a lady who goes by the name Slick Woods. No us neither, and we’re too lazy to Google. Anyway, Slick, if nothing else, makes a strong case for the reinvention of the trouser. Mere mortals and trouser reinvention doubters take note. Yes, like us, you may have thought that all that could be done with that most classic of garments had been done. Like us you were wrong. And since we’re on the subject of reinventing a classic, why not like Selma Blair decide to breath new into the trouser suit. Or is she breathing new life into the ballgown? Either way, this is most definitely a fresh new take on tailoring. Sharp! Which leads us rather neatly to Adriana Lima. Remember the Juicy Couture sweat pant? Wardrobe staple of The Simple Life stars Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie? Well it’s back. Velvet and low slung with a bit of Janet Jackson tailored bling on top for a dramatic evening update on the look. Juicy indeed. Elsa Hosk on the other hand has looked to the past, or at least appears to have looked to the past, and taken inspirations form two other personal icons of mine, Cher and Liza Minelli, channeling them in all their former Bob Mackie clad glory, in a vibrant shade of gold no less. The questions remains though, did he dress Liberace too? Once again, I could Google for the answer, but I’m a lazy bitch so won’t. To be honest, there’s rather a lot of personal icon channeling on the CFDA red carpet. Take the Olsen sisters for example. Not only are they giving us a lesson 80’s Cher, they’ve mastered the other two Witches of Eastwick with great aplomb too. Squint and you might think that a long overdue cast reunion was taking place before your eyes. Clare Danes on the other hand is giving us a strong case for new jewelry placement. Let’s real here for a moment, we’re, well I, am kind of bored of seeing diamonds on necks, wrists and ears. So been there done that. So 2015. The new place to display you’re finest flashy wares? The vulva. Or just above anyway. A focal point is always good on an outfit. It focuses the eye. Said resemblance to said organ is merely coincidental. Minds out of the gutter please dear readers. Last but not least, give it up for Laverne Cox, literally giving us a masterclass in what it means to own any red carpet you set foot on. Do you, like Laverne dream of owing the night? Then sit up and take note. The lady slays.
