The Glasses: Paul Smith

Forget phrenology. If you really want to get the measure of someone, look at their face furniture. Being of the myopic persuasion myself, it’s something I’ve had to get better at over the years. My first choice (aged 13 and reliant on the NHS) were an apology for my shortsighted weakness: nondescript, begging not to be noticed and easy to whip off at a moment’s notice when anyone (which wasn’t often) looked my way. The second pair signified a misplaced belief in my own personal style, but they really said, “Timmy Mallett-Su Pollard love child”. So, my obsession with spec analysis grew and I established a deep conviction about the following associations… Rimless frames = a precise and exacting mind, or very likely a serial killer. Round, horn-rimmed frames = to project intellect, so probably overcompensating for a less-than-brilliant mind. Colourful frames = kooky and artistic, but doubtless a suburban accountant yearning for a more interesting life. Tinted lenses = pervert. Enough said. So, next time you are selecting spectacles, ask yourself how you want to be seen. It’s simple. Paul Smith frames = creative but grounded. Stylish without being try-hard. Possibly an architect or graphic designer. Self-assured but open-minded. And, most importantly, not a pervert.

Take from “Ten Commandments” Issue 44 of 10 Men, TRIBE PACK QUEST, on newsstands now…