May 20, 2017 |
Apparently, there’s an age-old rule about blondes and citrus-hued colours. Never should the two meet. The world will crumble, rivers will turn to fire, apocalypse will be upon us. To which I say bullshit. Have these people never seen Tan Mom? That beautiful creation of yellow-blonde hair and violently orange-hued skin? She may not be on the front pages any more, but she’s still out there somewhere on the streets of New Jersey, and though it may at times feel like the apocalypse is upon us, the world is yet to self-combust. Not that we’re advocating singeing your skin via UV ray to achieve a new you for the new year (no one likes the smell of charred flesh). Rather, think of this as a strong argument for wearing an orange accessory if you happen to be – or in the process of being – in possession of a full head of blonde hair. Would Ralph have designed a tote of this hue if it did not match blonde hair? Have you not seen pictures of his wife, Ricky? So feel free to run the citrus rainbow, bathe in a shower of smooth Tropicana and frolic in the tote of orange at the end of it – just don’t match your shade of tan to the bag. If it’s orange, you want to say no to the UV and yes to the Ralph and wear your skin on your arm.
Taken from “Ten Commandments” Issue 58 of 10 Women, ANGELS PLEASURE FLUID, on newsstands now…
Fashion Editor Will Johns
