June 14, 2012 |
If Miu Miu Culte sunglasses were a film – and, yes, we know they have their own very special film, The Woman Dress by Giada Colagrande, but while it is amazing it does not work for our purposes – they would be Supergirl. The standoff between Selena and Supergirl would not be for control of the Omegahedron, but for the protective shield of the golden Culte sunglasses. With these in your possession you can face anything that comes your way. In our reinterpretation of the film, Selena, as played by Faye Dunaway, is lying on the circular bed in her boudoir. The walls are draped in pale gold satin. They off set the sparkle in the Miu Miu crystals at her neck and match her Culte sunglasses. She is contemplating the future: “I’m considering nothing less than world domination. Such a pretty world. I can’t wait until it’s all mine.” And soon it will be. For she is in possession of the Culte, the final piece in her dastardly plan. Suddenly she feels a whoosh of cold air. It is Supergirl. “I’ve come here to search for the Culte. A protective shield vital to Argo City. You see, that’s where I live.” “Who are you?” asks Selena. “I am Kara of Argo City, daughter of Alura and Zor-El, and I don’t scare easily. Who are you?” “I am Selena, Diodenes of Catania, Priestess of Sekhnet. I am the Ultimate Siren of Endor. And you, little lady, are trespassing on private property.” “The Culte,” says Supergirl, “I want them.” “Then you shall have them, Supergirl.” And with that Selena takes the glasses off her face and throws them at Supergirl’s feet. “Thank you, your sweetness,” says Supergirl, picking them up. “Don’t call me that. I am not sweet. I am Selena. And I am a bitter, bitter pill to swallow.” And with that she points her laser gun at Supergirl’s chest and stuns her. Supergirl drops the glasses and falls out the window. Selena stoops to pick them up and summons her most monstrous creation: “Power of Shadow, take shape. Look like a vicious dark star. Seek out that wretched young creature and destroy her. The world at last will be my oyster.” She cackles as she replaces the Cultes on her face and retires to her bed to resume her plans of world domination. “I have the world’s greatest protective shield. No one can stop me now.”
by Natalie Dembinska
