July 17, 2014 |
Look, a fist. It’s wearing a Diesel knuckleduster. How gangster. But what is it holding? A grenade? A neuralyzer (Agent K’s memory erasing device in Men in Black)? Nope. It’s an atomiser which emits a fragrance that, according to my reliable source Mr Press Release, is for the “intrepid tamer of time” who can “run like the wind, sniff out thunder and lightning and feel like a total child of nature”. Sounds like Ten Towers’ very own Will Johns. He’s got a nose like a bloodhound. And as for running like the wind, well, you should see the pace at which he races to the corner shop for his daily mid-afternoon KitKat Chunky Peanut Butter. Apparently the fragrance itself has notes of creamy coconut and moist moss which sounds to us what Bear Grylls might smell like. On a good day of course. Not when he has spent the night using a hollowed out camel carcass as a sleeping bag. No, when he has spend the day in the jungle, wielding his machete and eating live animals. Yes, Bear is very brave and wild – just how we like our men, and just like this fragrance.
By Ted Stansfield
