ARMANI PRIVE: THE COUTURE

FROM THE VAULT (SUMMER 2011)

Most people, when flicking through Style.com, ouuing and ahhing at the Armani Privé show, will probably assume that Mr Armani has taken his cue from his work with a certain Lady Gaga. But they’d be wrong. For this collection is a masterpiece in how to spin one subtle and unexpected reference into greatness. That reference – and may we suggest you hold on tight to your chairs so you do not fall off, dear readers – is Martian Girl from Mars Attacks! There was something almost otherworldly about the collection. As the Martian interpreter spoke of the Martians when they landed on earth coming in “peace”: “All green of skin… 800 centuries ago, their bodily fluids include the birth of half-breeds. For the fundamental truth self-determination of the cosmos, for dark is the suede that mows like a harvest.”

As when we watched the film, so do we have no idea what that means. But it does bring to mind shiny greenish-silver pools of light that, in our heads, greatly resemble what was sent down the runway. A more visual reference for those not blessed with quite the warped imagination we posses would be mercury, and how, when poured into water, it forms a glistening, quivering blob. Not that Mr Armani’s couture creations were blobs. They were feats of cocoon-shaped tailoring that glided more than simply moved. Their roundness, an echo of the “international sign of the doughnut”. The hats resembling the Martian ships. Could it be that Mr Armani is asking the same question as David Bowie before him? Is there life on Mars? Well, space tourism is looming – before long flying to the moon will be akin to boarding a flight to New York, so maybe it’s time to prepare. Make our peaceful intent known. And since our new friends probably, like us, tend to judge on appearances, communicating a friendly, unthreatening demeanour through clothes might be sensible. It’s certainly less tiring that circling one’s arm in the air, and far more flattering. And it seems more respectful to at least try to fit in with them and their culture, of which we know little, than impose ours on them. Also, who here hasn’t bonded with somebody over an outfit? Which leads us to only one conclusion: Mr Armani is the most forward-thinking, futuristic designer out there. One further thought: does this mean he’ll be designing matching space pods in which we will travel? He does a homeware line, so why not…?

www.armani.com

by Natalie Dembinska

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