July 16, 2016 |
Like Tiger Woods’s extramarital activities coming to light in a series of tabloid front pages, for which he has done the obligatory “rehab repentance”, so our re-casting the whole drama in our heads with the main stars dressed head to toe in Prada’s newest offerings has come to light. Well, maybe not quite Prada, more Ken doll in badly-stapled-together 1970s nylon, but then, it’s all about the power of imagination. We like to assume that Mrs Prada came up with this collection in a similar manner, but with a GI Joe (she’s the mother of two boys; we doubt Ken has made many appearances in her kitchen). Anyway, before we go off on yet another tangent that has nothing to do with anything, Mrs Prada, as we all know, seeks inspiration in things she hates. This season that would be golf, Americana and 1970s florals. At the time of writing, her opinion on Tiger Woods was unknown, so we’ll leave him out of it. We’ll admit we weren’t fans of those three either, but as is always the case with Mrs Prada, that is being re-evaluated. The clothes – those too-short boxy jackets, the cartoon prints, the neckerchiefs and the trousers worn over knee-high boots (which tighten over the boots, so that you can clearly see the boot, and have a slight 1970s pimp cut) – are so awkward they’re the most modern thought-provoking things to come down a runway. The only way to do it justice is to describe them as a cross between Mike Teavee in his cowboy costume and Hunter S Thompson, the inventor of shotgun golf – and these clothes would be perfect for that. We feel it’s best, when going outside with someone who will be shooting at golf balls, to wear something bright. So that they can see you. Clearly. Nothing like an accidental shooting to put a downer on proceedings. The first person Thompson told about shotgun golf, and who could claim to be one of its founding fathers, was Bill Murray, who starred in that 1980 golfing classic Caddyshack. So while, yes, the Prada collection might not quite resemble that film’s wardrobe, our thought process has come full circle. For us, that’s like having the father, son and holy ghost personally stitching together every seam. We like to imagine that Mrs Prada thinks in a similar way to us. She probably doesn’t.
Taken from 10 Men, Autumn/Spring 2012
Photograph by Jason Lloyd-Evans
