March 20, 2012 |
FROM THE VAULT (WINTER / SPRING 2012)
Oh, bloody hell, not Converse again! Well yes, we’re doing Converse again. We like them. They’re comfortable, and the pair we’re wearing has moulded itself so perfectly to our foot it has now become our foot. So when our inbox pings with news of a new Converse shoe, such as the All Star Outsider Boot, we naturally become rather excitable. The reason for our being more excitable than usual, though, is that we were recently Googling auras, trying to find out what colour ours was. In an uncommon moment of work avoidance, we wondered how best to decide whether a shoe is truly compatible with us. Answer: to pinpoint its aura. Compatible auras make for lifelong relationships. Now we realise this might sound a bit mental issues – someone call someone and gently put her in a van and lock her up – but bear with us. Yes, we read the press release. We know for a fact, like written in stone, yada yada, that the Outsider boot is “reminiscent of boots Converse made for the US military during World War II”. And that it has been “updated with tumbled leather and nubuck uppers, thick boot laces and deep heel tread”, resulting in a “modern, remixed version of the heritage inspired boot while built for urban terrain”. From that alone, we know this boot is perfect for us, but just to be extra, extra sure, we did a “What aura are you?” quiz. We answered the questions about lifestyle – is ours “weird, wild and wonderful? Do we care if people hate it? Or do we only live for making people happy?” We answered the same questions for the Outsider. We pressed submit and the answer came back as blue. We – both us and the boot – are spiritual and calm. We lead quiet but enriching lives. We are very giving of ourselves. The purpose of our lives, in fact, is simply to show love to other people or, in the case of our new “sole mate”, feet. Famous blues include Angelina Jolie, the Dalai Lama and Oprah. Now any boot that is compatible with Oprah is obviously a boot destined for great feet – ours. We can even do that awkward Oprah hug thing every morning as a showing of love to one another.
by Natalie Dembinska
